Be good to yourself!

Whether it is in an electronic device, in an agenda or in our mind, we all have a long list of things to do, the interesting thing is that most of the time our  needs are in the bottom of this list or maybe not even in it.  Do you take time to do the things you enjoy or are you so busy taking care of everyone else that there is no time left for you.  If we are not taking care of ourselves, sooner or later we may not be able to take care of anyone else, or we may do it, but with the wrong attitude and I don’t know about you, but I don’t want my life to become a long list of chores; I want to be able to enjoy every single thing I do.

We have been called to be witnesses, to be full of joy and to be a reflection of God’s light, but how can we do any of these if we are tired and overwhelmed.  We have not been made to barely make it day by day; “We are more than conquerors through him who loved us.” (Romans 8:37)

If we are not good to ourselves, how can we be good to anyone else?  I am sure you understand what I am talking about… I am not saying that we need to forget about people’s needs and just focus on us; I am just trying to remind you that there is a balance.  

Have you read Proverbs 31?  I am sure you have heard about this woman who may be a little annoying because she just seems too perfect. I have always wondered where does she get the time to do all the things she does. To be honest, If I read the passage quickly I get a little stressed because I am not doing half the things she is doing,  but if we read carefully we can see that  “She is clothed with strength and dignity, and she laughs with no fear of the future.  When she speaks, her words are wise, and kindness is the rule when she gives instructions.”  (Proverbs 31:25-26)  Maybe we are wasting too much time worrying about things we can’t control. Maybe we are not laughing enough because we are too busy to have fun or too proud to be a little silly.  Maybe we are spending too much time talking about what we shouldn’t or maybe we want to control everything and we don’t accept the help of the people around us.   It is not about what we are not doing, it is about enjoying everything we are doing. Life goes by too quickly to be wasting precious moments.

So how can we enjoy our life more? I believe it is all common sense, and I am sure you already know the answer, but may not realize it because you have been… too busy!

·         Time with God - I think the most important thing is our time with God.  We need God to renew our strenght daily; When we feed on God’s Word, when we believe His promises and know He is in control there is no reason to worry or fear “Have I not commanded you?  Be strong and courageous!  Do not be afraid or discouraged.  For the Lord your God is with you wherever you go.”  (Joshua 1:9)

·         Proper rest and good eating habits - How many nights have you spent worrying or thinking about all you had to do the next day? “I lay down and slept. I woke up in safety, for the Lord was watching over me.” (Psalm3:5)  And how many meals have you skipped because you simply had no time to eat? “Then the angel of the Lord came again and touched him and said, ‘Get up and eat some more, for there is a long journey ahead of you.” (1 Kings 19:7)

·         Have fun – Often take the time to do what makes you happy: dance, sing, take a nap, go out with friends, and enjoy life. “David danced before the Lord with all his might” (2 Samuel 6:14); “Let all who take refuge in you rejoice; let them sing joyful praises forever.” (Psalm 5:11)

 In the Book of Esther we read how this young woman ended up saving the Jewish people, but before she could do it she had to take time only for her and prepare “Hagai was very impressed with Esther and treated her kindly.  He quickly ordered a special menu for her and provided her with beauty treatments” (Esther 2:9)

Let’s make sure each day we devote some time to us, so we can enjoy the time we dedicate to others as we carry out our mission in life. 

Our pointing finger

Have you noticed how much we like it when people think like us, act like us and agree with us?  We enjoy being in our comfort zone, a safe place where we are accepted and where it is easy to be a believer. 

Sometimes we try so hard to be good and do all we can to show God our love, that we forget the people around us; we ignore those who disagree with us and quickly label them and put them aside. We forget what God commanded us: “love each other.  Just as I have loved you, you should love each other.”  (John 13:34) We are so busy trying to make everyone think like us that we don’t realize that “your love for one another will prove to the world that you are my disciples.”  (John 13:35)  There has to be less of us, less of our great ideas and long sermons trying to convince people that God is real and there has to be more love… more of Him.

In the Bible we often see how Jesus shared a lot of time with people who didn’t think or acted like Him.  He lived according to His beliefs and didn’t feel He needed to defend His principles; instead He let His actions speak.  His life was His testimony.  How nice would it be if we could go past our desire to constantly defend our opinion to the point of doing the complete opposite of what we stand for, just to prove we are right.  How nice would it be if we could learn to love like Jesus loves.

God clearly tells us not to judge others because it brings heavy consequences “stop judging others, and you will not be judged” (Matthew 7:1) but it is so tempting to judge those who do not agree with our views; the song “Jesus friend of sinners” by Casting Crowns beautifully describes this problem: “Jesus friend of sinners we have strayed so far away, we cut down people in your name but the sword was never ours to swing… open our eyes to the world at the end of our pointing finger, let our hearts be led by mercy, help us reach with open hearts and open doors.” 

“Accept Christians who are weak in faith, and don’t argue with them about what they think is right or wrong…God has accepted them. Who are you to condemn God’s servants? They are responsible to the Lord, so let him tell them whether they are right or wrong.”(Rom. 14:1;3-4) 

I love this verse! I like it when God puts me in my place and reminds me to be humble; I feel He is saying… “my dear child… who are you to think this or say that, focus on Me” It brings me back to my job description which is to be a servant of God, a believer and to glorify Him.   

So frequently we want to know where someone “stands” in certain issues before we decide how are we going to treat them, like Michael Kimpan said “too often we demand conformity prior to connection.”  As Christians our whole life needs to be submerged in love.  We need to surrender to God so He can shine through us, so He can be the one doing all the loving because alone, no matter how hard we try, we just can’t.

It should not be so hard to get this right… no, I am not being sarcastic, I really mean it. We should always remember how often God has forgiven us and how He loves us now where we are and He loved us then and He will always love us no matter what.   When we remember the grace we receive daily we hear God telling us “Give as freely as you have received!” (Matthew 10:8)  We should know that God loves everyone the same, that includes well… EVERYONE!

“No body knows what we’re for only what we are against when we judge the wounded.”  (Jesus Friend of Sinners) We are God’s witnesses; I pray that our daily actions show all the people around us who He really is.

Sharing a good meal

Do you have special memories created around a meal with friends and family?  Some of the most beautiful moments I have shared with people I love have been over a good meal.  It may have been a regular dinner at home, which was everything except regular, meals prepared with so much love by very special people or a simple bowl of lentils, shared with a friend over a wonderful conversation. 

There is something about a good meal; it is not only the food, but the complete experience that it is involved… the smells, the sounds, the colors, the lively conversation and the memories that are being created.   In the Bible we read many references to banquets and celebrations.  Eating is good fun! It is meant to be shared and enjoyed. “So the people went away to eat and drink at a festive meal, to share gifts of food, and to celebrate with great joy because they had heard God’s words and understood them.” (Nehemiah 8:12)

Sometimes with all the rush we live in we overlook the simple joy of eating. We forget that it is nice to spend time together, not because we have to, but because we want to; it is good to share the big accomplishments in life and the little day to day achievements.  Life should be celebrated each day. “And people should eat and drink and enjoy the fruits of their labor, for these are gifts from God.” (Ecclesiastes 3: 13) 

A good meal is an opportunity to thank God for His goodness. It is not a moment to go to extremes counting calories or over eating; on the contrary, it is a moment to unwind and remember God’s blessings.  For a good reason when Jesus was about to feed the 5,000 people, He said “Just tell them to sit down on the ground in groups of about fifty each… Jesus took the five loaves and two fish, looked up toward heaven, and asked God’s blessing on the food.  Breaking the loaves into pieces, he kept giving the bread and fish to the disciples to give to the people.  They all ate as much as they wanted, and they picked up twelve baskets of leftovers!”  (Luke 9:14-17)  Jesus wanted for the people to relax so they could fully enjoy the perfect provision that comes from heaven; the abundance of God.

In Genesis 18 we read how during a meal God gives Abraham a specific time when the son he had been promised years before will be born. And in Exodus 12 we read about the instructions for the Passover meal.  We also read many verses in which Jesus shared a meal, like the celebration of the wedding at Cana which Jesus attended with His mother, Mary and the disciples and where He turned the water into wine. Many times He would eat with the least popular people such as tax collectors and prostitutes without caring what people would say “The Pharisees were indignant why does your teacher eat with such scum? They asked his disciples” (Matthew 9:11).  He even invited Himself to dinner when He saw Zacchaeus, a rich tax collector up in a tree. “Zacchaeus! He said. Quick, come down!  For I must be a guest in your home today.” (Luke 19:5)

And it was during a meal, the Last Supper, where Jesus validated the new covenant “He took a loaf of bread; and when he had thanked God for it, he broke it in pieces and gave it to his disciples, saying ‘This is my body, given for you.  Do this in remembrance of me.’ After supper he took another cup of wine and said, ‘This wine is the token of God’s new covenant to save you - an agreement sealed with the blood I will pour out for you.” (Luke 22:19-20)

Even after Jesus’ resurrection He shared a meal with His disciples “when they got there, they saw that a charcoal fire was burning and fish were frying over it, and there was bread. ‘Bring some of the fish you’ve just caught,’ Jesus said…’Now come and have some breakfast!” (John 21:10-12)   

  

God has promised us an amazing celebration over a meal “In Jerusalem, the Lord Almighty will spread a wonderful feast for everyone around the world.  It will be a delicious feast of good food, with clear, well-age wine and choice beef.  In that day he will remove the cloud of gloom, the shadow of death that hangs over the earth.  He will swallow up death forever!  The Sovereign Lord will wipe away all tears…  The Lord has spoken!” (Isaiah 25:6-8) Now this is a meal I can’t wait to be part of!

Going back to memories related to food, when we had our clothing business in Colombia, we would go and visit the ladies who worked with us from their humble homes, very often, as soon as we arrived, they would offer us a cup of coffee. I still remember this as the best coffee I have had because it was offered with love from the very little they had. 

I wonder what will we remember from our now, what type of memories are being built by the meals we are sharing today.   

Believing the promises of God

I don’t know about you, but I don’t usually promise my children that I will do something or get something for them because I may or may not be able to comply and a promise has to be fulfilled.  When we read in the Bible all the amazing things God says He will do, we understand that He takes promises very seriously, and we can be certain that He will fulfill them because “every word of God proves true.”  (Proverbs 30:5) 

But sometimes it is hard to believe that all those wonderful promises are for real and they are for us.  We believe in God, we believe His Word, but for some reason we don’t take a hold of His promises and accept them as ours. It is as if we had something blocking us and it doesn’t allow us to see all the good things that God has so carefully and lovingly prepared for each of us. 

Let’s think about this… why is it so hard for us to believe that God will do all those amazing things in our life?  Do we doubt that He can? Do we feel we are not that important so why should He?  Do we think He is too busy to pay attention to us? 

Maybe our view is being blocked by our present circumstances; we may be having a rough time which makes anything positive seem impossible.  For a good reason God tells us that faith is “The confident assurance that what we hope for is going to happen.  It is the evidence of things we cannot yet see.”  (Hebrews 11:1)   and we are reminded that we “live by believing and not by seeing” (2 Corinthians 5:7), but isn’t it hard to believe what we can’t see?

As always we have a choice.  We can dwell in our problems and let them overwhelm us, or we can focus on the good things that God has said that He will do; the things we can’t see, but we know are coming.  When we concentrate on the good God can and will do we face our present with a different attitude; He strengthens us so we can enjoy the now, even if it is not everything it can be yet.  

We need to begin by knowing that “All Scripture is inspired by God” (2 Timothy 3:16),  if we keep this in mind, every time we read the Bible it will be easier for us to receive God’s comfort, guidance and love.  Once we quiet ourselves, then we can start reading, receiving and declaring God’s promises in our life.  The enemy wants to steal our peace, he wants us to be busy with our feelings because we waste time and energy when we are focusing on our pain and confusion; instead when we receive God’s peace we see everything with a new light.

You may say…“But it is so hard!” and you are right!  But what would you prefer?  Repeating over and over in your mind how angry, hurt, confused or fed up you are or know that you can “Give your burdens to the Lord, and he will take care of you.  He will not permit the godly to slip and fall.” (Psalm 55:22) and believe that “Those who live in the shelter of the Most High will find rest in the shadow of the Almighty.” (Psalm 91:1) I think the decision is easy because nothing can compare to God’s promises.

How can we continue feeling down when we read Isaiah 41:10 “Don’t be afraid, for I am with you.  Do not be dismayed, for I am your God.  I will strengthen you.  I will help you. I will uphold you with my victorious right hand.”  And like this, there are many verses that remind us that God is by our side every second of our lives. 

As we talk about promises, there is one thing we need to keep in mind; God wants to give us many wonderful things, but above everything, more important than anything is Him.  “Trust in the Lord and do good.  Then you will live safely in the land and prosper.  Take delight in the Lord, and he will give you your heart’s desire” (Psalm 37:3-4) our relationship with God is the most precious gift we can receive. If we delight in Him, if we share our life with Him then He “will supply all your needs from his glorious riches, which have been given to us in Christ Jesus.”  (Philippians 4:19)

Read carefully the promises of God and expect amazing things in your life. Our God is powerful and He is ready to act. “He has given us all of his rich and wonderful promises.  He has promised that you will escape the decadence all around you caused by evil desires and that you will share in his divine nature.  So make every effort to apply the benefits of these promises to your life.  (2 Peter1:4-5)

Be generous

Something amazing happens when we give; it is not only that warm and happy feeling we get when we are a blessing to others; it goes much deeper than that.  The Bible gives us many beautiful examples of generosity in action and it is full of promises for those who give with a joyful heart.  Giving is a wonderful component of our relationship with God because whether we realize it or not, many times our giving depends on our trust in Him.  

“Don’t give reluctantly or in response to pressure.  For God loves the person who gives cheerfully.  And God will generously provide all you need. (2 Corinthians 9:7-8)  You see, it is easy to praise God with our giving when things are going well, when we don’t lack anything and what He is asking from us is relatively easy, but when He starts addressing the things that are hindering our growth, then it gets hard. Many times we put our trust in money, beauty, time or knowledge instead of God; we hold on so tightly to these things that we can’t open our arms to receive everything God has for us. 

Being generous is not about giving the leftovers or the surplus; it is about giving what God asks us to give, even when we think we don’t have enough.  It is an opportunity to witness God’s loving power as He multiplies and does amazing things with what we give.  

Dave Martin said: “God, make me a distribution center of your blessings” Don’t you love this image?  Everything we have has been given by God for a reason; have you ever asked yourself why some people have so much and others so little?  It seems unfair, but then again, God knows what He is doing and even if we can’t understand it, we need to do our part and bless those around us as God directs us.  God loves to use us as a channel for His blessings, remember what He said to Abraham “I will cause you to become the father of a great nation.  I will bless you and make you famous, and I will make you a blessing to others.” (Genesis 12:2)

In Ecclesiastes 11:1 we read “Give generously, for your gifts will return to you later.” And in Proverbs 11:24 we see that “it is possible to give freely and become more wealthy, but those who are stingy will lose everything.”  Still God knows how hard it is for us to let go, especially of money, so He puts it very plainly for us to understand “Those who love money will never have enough.  How absurd to think that wealth brings true happiness!  The more you have, the more people come to help you spend it.  So what is the advantage of wealth – except perhaps to watch it run through your fingers! (Ecclesiastes 5:10-11)    Money is not bad, but trusting that money will solve everything and make us happy, that is the problem.

There is someone out there needing what we can share, and we can give so much more than we realize.  Most likely it will interfere with our schedule and it will take an effort, but we can be sure that whatever “trouble” we have to endure as we give to others, will be returned to us in blessings. “If you give, you will receive.  Your gift will return to you in full measure, pressed down, shaken together to make room for more, and running over.  Whatever measure you use in giving – large or small – it will be used to measure what is given back to you.” (Luke 6:38)  Don’t you just love this?  Isn’t it exciting? Pay close attention to the words God is using to illustrate how much He wants to bless us… full measure, pressed down to make room for more until it overflows… I like that!  A constant flood of blessings, a continuous process of giving and receiving.  “The generous prosper and are satisfied; those who refresh others will themselves be refreshed.”  (Proverbs 11:25)  

You are beautiful!

It is interesting how the way we see ourselves many times depends on what we are told, whether true or false.  There’s great danger when we rely on others to define our worth.  Are we more beautiful because people say so?  Do we become less valuable when we mess up and make mistakes?  Should past experiences label us and determine our future?

Sometimes we place too much importance on what people think of us, as if we are looking for approval, wanting them to like us or simply trying to fit in.  Maybe they don’t like us and that is ok, maybe we are not supposed to fit in, maybe we should start listening to what God has said, is saying and will always say about us.

“The Lord who created you says: ‘Do not be afraid, for I have ransomed you.  I have called you by name; you are mine…You are precious to me.  You are honored, and I love you.” (Isaiah 43:1; 4)  This is what “the Lord, your God, the Holy One of Israel your Savior” (Isaiah 43:3) is saying to you and me.  Maybe if we would concentrate on what He is saying instead of what others can’t say or won’t say, we will begin to understand how valuable, inexplicably wonderful and beautiful we are, not because of what we look like, who we are or what we have done, but because God made us in His image, with a purpose.   

Sometimes we allow others to mistreat us because we don’t know who we are; it seems that we see ourselves through glasses that only focus on the negative. Some people live surrounded by so many lies that it hard for them to recognize the truth, even if it is obviously in front of them.  It doesn’t matter how messy our life is or was, one thing stands firm and is God’s love for us from the beginning of time “You watched me as I was being formed in utter seclusion, as I was woven together in the dark of my womb.  You saw me before I was born.  Every day of my life was recorded in your book.  Every moment was laid out before a single day had passed.  How precious are your thoughts about me, O God!  They are innumerable! I can’t even count them; they outnumber the grains of sand!” (Psalm 139:15-17)

Some people may read this and say “if God knows it all, why He permits the bad things that happen to people?” I could say that many times we look for trouble by ignoring God; that during difficulties we grow or that faith needs to be strengthened so we can be used by God; I could write many verses to back these points up, but I will only say that when God created Adam He knew what was going to happen and He knew His Son, Jesus would have to suffer and die; His beloved Son would be sacrificed for us… and He still did it. God’s plan is bigger than we could ever understand, this is not about trying to figure Him out, it is about trusting Him.  “God has made everything beautiful for its own time.  He has planted eternity in the human heart, but even so, people cannot see the whole scope of God’s work from beginning to end.” (Ecclesiastes 3:11)

So what do we do when we don’t feel as beautiful as God says we are?

·         Don’t let people bring you down

We need to surround ourselves with good company; if someone close to us is bringing us down, we need to let them know. 

It is important also to stop looking for people’s approval or putting people in pedestals “Stop putting your trust in mere humans. They are as frail as breath.  How can they be of help to anyone?” (Isaiah 2:22)

·         Focus on real beauty

What society has labeled as beautiful is very superficial and doesn’t last long; instead real beauty is deep within us “Don’t be concerned about the outward beauty that depends on fancy hairstyles, expensive jewelry, or beautiful clothes.  You should be known for the beauty that comes from within, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which is so precious to God.  (1 Peter 3:3)  Charm is deceptive, and beauty does not last; but a woman who fears the Lord will be greatly praised. (Proverbs 31:30)

·         Keep focusing on what God says about you

Continue reading all the wonderful things God says about you in the Bible.  Keep looking around for His daily display of love; continue growing and learning and receiving God’s awesome love.  “Those who look to him for help will be radiant with joy; no shadow of shame will darken their faces.” (Psalm 34:5)  “For we are God’s masterpiece.  He has created us anew in Christ Jesus, so that we can do the good things he planned for us long ago.” (Ephesians 2:10)

When we know we have been created with a purpose by a loving God, we have a new outlook in life; when we know we don’t have to be perfect, a heavy weight is lifted and we can be free to be who God created us to be.  We can be our beautiful selves!

Real Love

The other day I was talking to two young women and they kept telling me that true love doesn’t exist.  They complained that guys don’t know anything about love and romance and that it is hard to find couples that are happy after being together for some years.  I thought this was a very sad statement, but it made me think… What are we teaching our young people about love? And what is our example telling them?

You may also be a little skeptical about the …“and they lived happily ever after” ending.  When we look around it is becoming a real challenge to find happily married couples and maybe one way or another we have experienced the complete opposite, but no matter what, I still believe in love.  Love is real and very much alive; it is possible and attainable.  How can I be so sure? God said it and I believe Him.  “God is love, and all who live in love live in God, and God lives in them.  And as we live in God, our love grows more perfect.” (1 John 4:16-17) “We know what real love is because Christ gave up his life for us.”  (1 John 3:16).  You may argue, “yes, but that is God’s love, that is way up there, and we are talking about the everyday happenings in our relationships between friends; boyfriends and girlfriends; husbands and wives” First of all our relationship with God is very real and it is the most important one we will ever have.   Besides, God gives us advice for all the other relationships in our life; we can find all the answers in the Bible. God tells us how to treat our friends “Do for others as you would like them to do for you.” (Luke 6:31); and He advices couples to choose a partner who believes in Christ “Don’t team up with those who are unbelievers.” (2 Corinthians 6:14).  He speaks to young people “How can a young person stay pure? By obeying your word and following its rules.” (Psalm 119:9) and gives advice to married couples “You wives will submit to your husbands as you do to the Lord.  For a husband is the head of his wife as Christ is the head of his body, the church…And you husbands must love your wives with the same love Christ showed the church.  He gave up his life for her.” (Ephesians 5:22-25) 

Like Toby Mac’s song says “This ain’t no ordinary love”  This is deep, it goes beyond the superficial things that bother us, the things that we want and we don’t get, real love is about following Jesus’ example, so if we want to practice real love, we need to read about His life and imitate it. 

The thing is that real love is very different from what has been rooted in our mind, real love is not about the butterflies in our stomach; I mean we do get those and we should, but it has to go deeper, because if that is all there is in a relationship, sooner or later those butterflies will fly away.  Real love requires time, dedication, and many times sacrifice. But not the sacrifice many people think about… We are not talking about putting up with someone “for the children” while doing nothing to make things better, or having a martyr attitude… Jesus didn’t die for us so we would live and love half way; He has prepared big thing for us, but we have to do our part.

Love requires patience and humbleness “Be humble and gentle.  Be patient with each other, making allowance for each other’s faults because of your love.” (Ephesians 4:2) When two people in a relationship put God first and ask Him to teach them to love the way He does, then His love flows; it is a daily display of respect, joy and appreciation.  It is enjoying the other person for who she or he is, not who we wish they were.  They may still have those little things that drive us crazy, but they seem so small when we look at all the good things they have. “Most important of all, continue to show deep love for each other, for love covers a multitude of sins.” (1 Peter 4:8)

Love is possible, you can believe it and start practicing; don’t give up, love always wins! Keep close this beautiful verse from 1 Corinthians 13:4-7 “Love is patient and kind.  Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude.  Love does not demand its own way.  Love is not irritable, and it keeps no record of when it has been wronged.  It is never glad about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out.  Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.”   Let’s put these words into practice and teach our children what real love is so then they can love and be loved as God intended it.